It's funny. If you work in education or a social services field, you start to understand a lot about people. Whether it's the psychology or human development classes you take in college or the experiences you have working with people, you start to figure things out. Don't get me wrong, I am not a psychologist or a mental health counselor. I wouldn't know what to do in a therapy session. But I have come to develop some understanding of human behavior, especially my own. Today, as I finally sat down to relax for a few minutes (at 7pm), I'm doing a little armchair self-psychoanalysis. Let me explain...
I walked into a quiet house. I was alone, my son went to work and my husband was at a meeting. I dropped my purse on the dining room table and pulled out my cell phone leaving it next to my purse. Normally my next step would be to go upstairs, change my clothes, and tie up my hair. Then I would wash up and cook dinner. Tonight, I did no such thing. At least not right away. First, I went into the kitchen and threw out some trash I brought in from the car that was still in my hand. Walking over to the trash can, I noticed my dog's food bowl was still full from yesterday. I had to empty it because she's been sick and it had broth poured over it last night. She didn't eat it and now it was mush. So I dumped it out in the trash can and washed her bowl, leaving it on the counter to dry. That's when I noticed there were several rinsed out containers needing to be put in the recycle bin, and I did that. There were also a couple of dirty dishes that hadn't made it to the dishwasher yet. Hmmm, one guess whose dishes they were. (Hint: Not me, not my husband.) When I was satisfied everything was in order in the kitchen, I walked back to the dining room.
Let me just tell you about my dining room. It's right when you walk in the door, so it's a dumping ground for everyone's crap! There were piles of mail, mostly opened and full of junk like credit card offers we don't need and ads. I pull out every piece of paper strewn about and sorted through each piece. A magazine and a car stereo manual for my husband, a swim award certificate and some scout paperwork for my husband, a bunch of trash, and a bill for me. I put it all in its respective places, and I could start to see the beautiful wood of the my dining room table top. Next I took a shopping bag, and collected every piece of stuff my son had left around the dining room floor, the bench he sits on at the table, and the table top. Brace yourself, a box from one of his Christmas presents, a report card, some computer pieces, a wire, a t-shirt, the list is too long to include everything. I have been asking him for months to clean it up, and he complains he has nowhere to put it all. But that shopping bag held all of it, and I took it with the two hoodies he left on the living room and brought it all up to his room. He'll have to find a place for it or throw it out. After that, I returned the three screwdrivers and various screws along with a ruler, to the my husbands toolbox area in the garage. He'll have to find a home for them. Finally, I put away the two dirty cups left on the table after last night's dinner. Give you another guess. I took the two books I left on the table and placed them on the book shelf, and gathered up some small items I received as gifts at a work breakfast yesterday. The dining room table is fit for a meal now.
Next, I took a couple of Amazon boxes, which in our house are more common than cereal boxes, and put them in a pile by the garage door for my husband to sort through. He likes to keep some but not others and I never know which ones. Then I went upstairs where I took off my jewelry and put it away. I changed out of my work clothes, put my shoes away and straightened up my closet. And then I cleaned up my night table which had begun to gather things like Neosporin and first aid tape (My husband had a wound I was covering daily last week.), a necklace I wore earlier in the week and didn't put away, and other odds and ends.
Finally, 45 minutes later, I came downstairs, sat down on the couch and thought about what I had done. And now I get to my point. Right now things are kind of stressful in my life. I have little control over a lot of what is happening around me. I am in perpetual crazy mode at work with testing season weighing on me. I have been down a teacher who is out sick, and trying as usual to keep my team together. Today, I had two pressing things I needed to deal with and I couldn't because I was stuck in a test session with no electronic communication allowed, and no ability to do anything other than stare at the kids testing. But I will spare you a diatribe on standardized testing. At home, my dog is slowly fading. We are in constant limbo about when the right time is to put her to sleep to prevent suffering, and trying to keep her comfortable. We have some family issues outside our home which are becoming a little stressful. Comparatively speaking, my life is pretty good. I just have a lot going on that is out of my control.
So here is where the understanding of human behavior comes into play. When things in our lives feel out of control, we look for things we can control. The mess all around me is largely out of my control, but the mess inside my house is in my control. So I cleaned it up. Hopefully, keeping the clutter and disarray out of my home will help me keep it out of my life. And though some things are inevitably out of my control, I have 100% control over how I deal with them. You know what they say: Knowing is half the battle.
I'm in control, and I love it. -Janet Jackson
Pretty sure she's lip-syncing here, but who cares. Love the dancing!
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