Kids

Resilient.
I can't think of a better word
to describe children living in chaos.
It's as if the instability prepares them,
it's as if they're unfazed.
And I think for a moment, maybe they are.
Maybe it's the rest of us who are distraught,
concerned for them with aching hearts,
worried about what will happen to them.

Not so.

Kids are good at hiding tumult.
Their minds and hearts find ways to cope,
that is, until they can't.
So you wonder
when the giggles will turn to sobs
when the playing will turn to fighting
when the coping will turn to destructing.
And you try to protect them.

Sometimes you can.

They need to feel safe and secure.
So you feed them and hug them,
you clothe them and you love them.
And you read with them and play games,
and tell them how wonderful it is
when they complete a jigsaw puzzle,
or button a shirt or tie a shoe all on their own.
You struggle with them through homework.

You tell them you love them.

They're resilient alright.
But they are not immune to abuse and neglect.
They are not old enough to find their way on their own.
They are not bulletproof.

They deserve better.

Understudy

Tonight was an unusual evening, that really wasn't unusual at all. My son's friend, who is as much another kid in our house as he is our son's friend (they've been friends since elementary school and he's the son of our good friend) is staying with us for the weekend because his parents are away. We had plans to go out for dinner and run a few errands, and our son was at work. So we planned an evening out as usual, only our weekend son came with us instead. Max is three years younger than Jacob and we've watch him grow right along side our own boy. He's been like a kid brother to Jacob and now they have grown into young men. Tonight we took Max out to dinner (where Jacob works) and ran errands. It was kind of neat. We are so comfortable with Max, and he with us, that he felt like an understudy for Jacob. No plans were changed, no awkward moments transpired. Just a Friday night out with someone else's son!