I've been studying up a bit on teacher retention and burnout. It's part of the programming I'm working on at my job, and well, let's face it. All teachers, and really most "helping professions" struggle with burnout. I've felt it before. It's different from exhaustion, though one certainly feeds the other. When I feel burnt out, I experience feelings of frustration and anger. Fueled by exhaustion, which often accompanies burnout, I go to bed feeling despair and wake with anger about having go to work. When burnout has set in, it's not uncommon for me to consider how irresponsible or worthwhile it would be to call in sick. Of course I rarely do.
Straight up exhaustion is different, at least for me. I don't feel as desperate and I definitely don't feel angry. I just feel tired. Tired with a capital T. I find myself drinking more coffee, not having as many hours with acute cognitive ability, and asking almost everyday, is it Friday yet?
But what does this all have to do with planning ahead? It's simple. We can manage things better when we take them in small chunks. As teachers we talk about this with our kids, especially the ones who struggle most. Take it a little at a time. Baby steps. You've heard it all before. I had the recent realization that when I have things on my calendar to look forward to, I can think and work and it seems doable. Just four more weeks until this trip, or six more weeks until the concert. I was mopey in June over not having the summer off. The idea of ploughing through all summer while watching all my teacher friends brag on Facebook about their summer adventures had really got me down. I knew I was just tired. Last summer I was burnt out. At the start of this summer, I was just exhausted.
Then June was half over, and my first summer mini vacation was in sight. I went away with my sister over independence day weekend. I returned to a short week, and then I was into the countdown to my family summer vacation. The first week of August I'll be off with my boys. We return and then it's two weeks until my girlfriends' overnight getaway to the Dixie Chicks concert. Having things to look forward to sure does make work workable.
So here's my point. I think I'm going to try to plan something exciting or fun, every month this year. A romantic weekend getaway, a concert with my boys, we'll make sure there's something on the calendar every month. Maybe planning ahead has it's merits too. Life is a constant reflection, especially as a writer. So I thought one thing yesterday and I've altered my perspective today. I'm just a work in progress.
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